Saturday, December 30, 2006

Auld Ang Syne, is that right?

The Global Outrage of an Educated Man.....vol.50
"Reality is like a face reflected in the blade of a knife; it's properties depend on the angle from which we view it." Master Hsing Yun "Describing the Indescribable"
The main headline of the day or in the dawning of the sun to another day of only 6 hours of electricity if you're in Baghdad, is that the once gloriously brutal sword swash buckling dictator is now dead. No not George W., I can't be that lucky. Are you getting this secret service. You know where I live. No, I'm talking about the death sentence where the executioners are just as guilty as the executed.  The dictator that did serve in a war, unlike every single member of our current administration. But let me not quivvel on facts. Yes, Saddam Hussein, our good friend from the 80's when we were backing his army in their 10year war against Iran. Oh, how the times had changed for the once photographed smiling and shaking hands with our former Defense Secretary, Donald Rumsfeld, who should have been up there on the gallows along with good ole' Saddam. But what are you gonna do, except stay the course, push on because it's hard work and not take the advice of the Iraq Study Group, not one of the 79 recommendations. Not one. But I'll listen to what they have to say.  Ask yourselves, and we don't have a fascist dictatorship in full swing? Please.
People, we are a country where we pride ourselves on the glories and attributes of freedom and democracy and lifting up the poor and hungry masses, but don't life a finger for the now already 400,000 dead in Darfur. But why lift a finger? The ones who are dying are Muslim. They're all terrorists anyhow. Let them die. There is no oil reserves over there for us anyway. Let them die and then we can move in and take all of their abundant natural resources which they must be sitting on. Oh, sorry, that's the entire continent of Africa. But really, we want to give you peace and liberty and democracy for all men, women and children. Freedom is each person's God given right. We must spread that throughout the world, but only if we profit from it.
Now open up and say ahhhhh. How about some nice yummy, genetically engineered all natural, except for the fact that it's cloned, food. Safe to eat. Yummy yummy yummy. The FDA says its fine. Trust them. I don't. And they don't even have to put labels on it. Nice. But you can't smoke a joint. Nice. But you can pop a pill for your restless legs. What the f!!!! is going on people.
First it was the pets, now it's the food. Next it's gonna be you. Think about it.
Then again, think about a Casino in Vegas, catered only to men, where you have nothing but clones of Jessica Simpson and Angelina Jolie's as waitresses and hostesses and madams. That's not so bad is it? Ladies, wouldn't you want your own Brad Pitt or Doctor Mcdreamy.
Think about it. Like kids on the backs of milk cartons. The chips are coming.
And we aren't playing God? If you believe in that sort of thing. Or it's just science. Science is good. Science never harmed a soul.
How could it, because souls and science cannot co-exist, or can they? Mull on that one while your getting ready for American Idol.
Now for something on the lighter side of life.
As warned at the end of my last outrages, which have seen a jolt of caffeine as of late.  I have fell under the spell of a musical russian nymph who was relocated to New York City. Her name is Regina Spektor. You may have seen her video on VH1. That other channel that still plays videos. Ladies and gentlemen, she is charming like a young Natalie Portman in the film Beautiful Girls, where you could tell that she was going to be a star.  Regina's ability for swinging through the pitch and the tempo with her quirky anecdotes and em-phasis placed on certain syllables, make her a gypsy of the 21st Century. Like a much more friendlier version of Fiona Apple, listen and you'll be hooked.
Finally, quality Television has hit another all time high. But this time it has come from an unexpected candidate. The Lifetime channel. Who now brings us yet another Reality T.V. Game show, "Gay, Straight or Taken" which female contestants now get to take a stab as to which good looking guy is etc., you get the deal. It is sure to be a hit. Nothing but informative television for the women. The equal rights movement has come a long way hasn't it? Whether it be Oprah telling you what to buy or the latest fashion magazine placing the importance on what Nicole Richie has or hasn't been eating. Always look your best ladies. Just don't think it. 
You may be wondering where that came from. I don't know either. But like my Dog Rufus always says, "Deal with it."
Happy New Year. 2007 and where are the flying cars?
"When you do something, you should burn yourself completely, like a good bonfire, leaving no trace of yourself." Shunryu Suzuki

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